My Best Friend Is Gone – 41

By Boyce Saxton

I am so alone and my anxieties are building up.  I want to take a gun and shoot towards my throbbing pain. The pain is so painful, I can’t even comprehend it.

I can sit in a corner for days, rocking back and forth, like a mad man in a hospital.  I don’t know what I should do? I am the clever one, but in this case, I don’t know what 1+1 is.

I am so discourage, I cry myself to sleep hoping to see his smiling face in the window.  I am like an overly emotional girl during menstruation.  I will cry until my tears are no more.  My heart is cold as ice and my body is numb to the outside world.  I don’t want to eat or drink to my heart’s content.  I have aged like an old man on his last leg.

With Max (it was always Boyce and Max together), he was my drug who I was addicted too, and I was his.  Our game play was the gateway to our world of bliss and freedom from the stress and darkness.  He was my partner in crime and the only family member, I trusted.  Now, he is gone like a ghost who lingers around.

He was my savior and the only person who could put me at peace.  Now, I’m a robot that follows strict orders and lost my free will.

Now, my best friend is gone and I don’t know who I should lean on. It’s like a chuck of me was eaten by a starving tiger and now, I am just a hollow shell of a man, waiting for this thing called death; which I can’t do.

Now, I have to think he is dead and his body is with the Werewolves.

His funeral was in my heart and there were rain clouds which swirled in my soul.  My best friend is gone.  Decrease. No more.

When I found out he was half-vamp, I wanted to die.  He was the only one who knew the real me and comforted me in my failures.  My life will never be the same, since now, he is gone.

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