Broken
By E
I sit in a corner of my child-like room, filled with stuff animals and dolls, with a library of child-like books and walk-in closet filled with stupid child-like clothes.
I look around my room and rage overwhelms me like a cloth attaching itself to me and I can’t shake it off.
Tears run down my face like a leaking faucet. My body aches as if someone who’s mentally deranged is stabbing me with sharp little needles. I want to take my brain out to get peace of mind. Why, did this happen? What did I do wrong? What could I have done differently?
The voices sing in my head, swirling around like a MP3 song over and over again. I smack my head with my hand to make the voices to stop. I yell and scream but the voices torment me with the same sad song. The song they sing is about a romance gone wrong.
My body is cold as ice and my love is gone. My heart is no more. The love I had for him is becoming a dream which I do not want to wake up from. I love him so much, the thought of not being around him feels like my body is being burned by fire as I scream out for help.
I’m broken.
As I think about him in my mind, I want to die.
As I bow my head, I pray to my God:
Dear God,
Please help me through this. Please kill my pain. Please help me through this as I beg. I want to put my problems on you. I don’t want to think about him anymore. My heart hurts and my love is gone. God, why am I sad? God, I love you so much, but I need you here. I need you with me. Help me as the pain is in me because I want to die. I’m broken and lost. God, for god sake, help me.
After my pray with an unknown God who may have damned me, a bright light enters my room as an awe of love, but mystery. What is this thing?
This thing shows me a smile. What is it? Is it God?
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